Monica's First Birthday

Our Little Miss Sunshine is One.

Well, we did not throw her a big party – just a simple get together with closest family and friends to celebrate Monica’s first birthday. We’re very practical parents and to think that it’s only Beej who brings money to the household, we opted not to spend too much on our baby’s birthday. Plus Monica won’t remember a party so big naman. But, of course, if we have the super huge amount of pera, why not organize a bonggang party right? 🙂

Anyhow, we chose Little Miss Sunshine because as you all know, Monica is a ray of sunshine to us and to those people who love and adore her. She has always been a happy and smiling baby – with only less than 10 episodes of fussiness in her 1 year of existence. Imagine how bait and happy my baby is? Such a darling, really! <3

We initially thought of just celebrating her birthday at Jollibee: 1. Because it’s a complete package, affordable at that. 2. The daddy loves Jollibee – like the dancing mascot! Haha.

But the closest Jollibee in our area could not accommodate 100pax so we let it go and looked for another one. I thought of the Dad’s Merienda buffet (Glorietta) and inquired. Yay for free function room and sound system usage for a guaranteed guests of 100. Super nice! The merienda buffet is P258 per person only! What a deal! To cut it short, we signed the contract and pushed through with the plan: just have merienda, simple styling, and blow the cake ceremony for Monica.

It was a success I must say! Guests went home busog and had fun doing some chika chika with common friends. Our birthday girl didn’t smile a lot during the party, but hey, she did not cry at all. Probably just gulat with all the people trying to greet her. Haha.
Sharing some photos from our dearest friends, Rickson and Joy of Lomograpika.
 


 

Venue: Dad’s Glorietta
Photographer: Rickson Chew and Juya Calvez Chew of Lomograpika Design Studios
Styling: Mau of  Mauzzzy’s Events and Balloons
Cake: Maj of Majesty Cakes
Monica’s Dresses: Sugarkissed and Kariannas Closet
Monica’s Shoes: Mini Melissa Ph

 
 

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Breastfeeding Feels

Breastfeeding Unfiltered
Among all the things I am proud of in my life, nothing beats nurturing my child.
Thirteen months of exclusive and direct breastfeeding. Yes, that’s a feat. I know not all mothers are blessed with this gift that’s why I am so thankful that I am. My breastfeeding journey is not at all stressful – in fact, I have always had good milk supply, my daughter latches so well, and so on.
But my story is about how much I have embraced breastfeeding. I may not have had a stressful journey but sustaining it is not a walk in the park either. I am a work at home mom, with no yaya nor helper. It’s just me and husband with our baby. To say that I am always tired is an understatement – it really is no joke to take care of a baby and the whole household.
I don’t have a regular ‘me’ time, I have not gone out with friends alone – I always bring my daughter because she directly feeds from me and I don’t have the heart to leave her. There were days that I would just scream and cry because of exhaustion and depression (normal for moms). But, whenever I look at my daughter, all ill feelings go away. She would latch on me, either to satisfy hunger or to seek comfort. Knowing that I give her the best that I can, is more than enough to keep me going.
I have never been this fulfilled in my life. Knowing that I nurture my daughter the best way I know makes me feel super. Thanks to our breastfeeding journey. Also, I could have not done this without the support from my husband, family, and friends. They all cheered me on and made sure I am also well-fed and happy.  🙂
August is Breastfeeding Month – hence, this post and photo. I am so proud!
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Till next,
Din

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The Mommy Hair

Hair was never really a concern in my life – I believe I’ve been blessed with a very healthy and manageable hair UNTIL mommyhood! Haha. This is one thing that nobody warned me about. YOU WILL GO CRAZY with your hair – well at least based on my experience. Well, yeah, not really crazy but definitely disturbing.

At 4 months post-partum, I started having problems with hair fall (due to hormonal changes after pregnancy and child-birth). I would literally see hair strandsssss everywhere! And even if I just sit still and do nothing, my hair falls off! Imagine that. So annoying!

At around 10 months post-partum, I felt I needed to regroup and change my aura so I will feel good about myself. Yeah, motherhood is really tiring and consuming so yes, you can say that I belong to the mothers who, most of the time, forget to take care of themselves. Anyhow, I had my hair curled (digiperm) because I thought that would make me feel good. Well, at some point it did. Who would not want to wake up every single day with your hair looking like you’re going to a party or event? Haha. Yeah, i loved my curls.

But… it’s hard to maintain because I always needed to tie it up so it won’t add to the things I have to manage and think of everyday. Whenever we go out, I would let my curls down but not even 2 hours outside, i would feel irritated and will just tie up again so as to make sure it won’t get to Monica’s face or Monica pulling it. Haha.

So one day, I woke up wanting to just cut my hair short. I wanted a different look. I wanted my hair to be the least of my worries and still feel good about it. Tadaaaaa. Monica and I went to the salon and had my hair cut! AND I HAVE NEVER FELT THIS GOOD ABOUT MY HAIR. YAY!

So here’s the evolution of my hair. Lels

This one, the day before I have birth. See, my hair was really long. And messy. Really. Haha

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Then 2months post-partum, I had it cut so that I would feel pretty naman. Haha. Pardon my haggard and puyat look. MOTHERHOOD YEAH. Thanks to Azta Urban Salon for this.

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This one is the kulot version by Tony and Jackey on the 10th month post-partum.

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And this one is the latest. SO HAPPY WITH THIS!! Thanks to Mike of Studio Fix by Alex Carbonell!

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If there’s one thing that motherhood taught me, that’s to be brave. BRAVE ENOUGH TO TRY. In my case, try this short hair look. Nyahahahaha. But I love it! They said short hair won’t be bagay to chubby faces like mine, I’d say, KEBS. I did it for convenience actually. I feel very light and I wouldn’t have to worry about my hair now. And most importantly, this makes me feel really good. So KEBS sa big face. Haha.

Till next,

Din

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#DearMonica

#DearMonica,
A year ago, I gave birth to you. For one whole year, I breastfed you, nourished you, took care of you 24/7. There were times that I cried because of exhaustion, depression, and loneliness. You see, motherhood is something new to me. And I am learning everyday. And though I prepared for this, I feel that I am still lost at times.
Anak, it’s not easy but you are worth it. All the sleepless nights, body pains, messy days, and more are nothing compared to the happiness you bring to our lives.
Yes I gave birth to you. But you have also given birth to a better version of myself. I never thought I could do the things I am doing, now that I am mother. Anak this is the best of me, this is my happiest. I know it’s only been a year but it feels more than that.
Thank you for all your smiles and giggles. For your contagious laughter and sweet hugs. Thank you for your kisses.
Happy 1st Birthday, our Monica.
I love you anak, sobra.
Love,
Mommy, 24 June 2017
 
PS: I would not have survived the first year if not for a very supportive and loving husband and daddy. I love you Beejay.
 
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Mommy Body

“Ano ba yan, nanay na nanay ka na”
“Huy kelan ka ba papayat?”
“Ang laki mo na ah”
So annoying right? Yeah I heard those lines from people and I was really offended. They may not mean it but it made me really insecure. Hello I was not really payat to begin with! Haha. It’s okay naman to joke around – it’s just that, for a stay at home mommy who does not have time for herself, this really hurts. I know it’s a matter of perspective, but still, it hurts.
I did not gain a lot. Maarte lang talaga ako. Plus people expect mommies to be in good shape agad nowadays. Thanks to Social Media for being so unrealistic. Haha. Trend na ngayon na dapat payat agad.
Seriously speaking – it is insensitive to ask a mother to lose weight right away. Especially if you have no idea what she has been through or what she’s going through. Try mo kaya mag-alaga ng bata 24/7 while doing house chores? Haha.
I guess what I wanted to say is, stop body shaming of any kind. It’s just not good. And as for me, I am praying to just take these things constructively so I can improve myself. Afterall, I think they mean well. Sensitive lang talaga ako. Hahaha.
PS: My husband keeps on reassuring me that I am beautiful and not fat. So, kebs. Chos! Hehe 😀

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Breastfeeding Journey

Today is exactly 10 months and 10 days of exclusively and directly breastfeeding Monica. While I believe that FED is BEST, I think I still deserve a pat on the back for reaching this far and for wanting for more.
Breastfeeding my child was and is the ONLY option I want. Primarily because I was breastfed (and my mommy kept on sharing stories about it) and formula feeding was not really something I have knowledge about.
When Monica first latched on me, I knew there was milk and it was enough. That’s the only thing I entertained and it never crossed my mind that I’ll have  a problem breastfeeding her. Mighty power of positive thinking I must say. I only had issues on the 3rd day when I felt my nipple was so sore and my breast suddenly became so engorged. I thought Monica was just feeding so excessively and aggressively, boy I was wrong. Her latch was incorrect, thanks to MMC’s Lactation Consultant who did rounds that day and saved my sanity. Haha. She taught me the correct one and that moment, all the pain went away.
I was so thankful it was corrected right before we were discharged. It made our journey a little bit easier than some. <3
I tried introducing the bottle  on Monica’s 4th month but she refused it. So I decided to just feed her directly. We are together 24/7 – I bring her with me anywhere and everywhere. We would go to the mall together, I will try to fit clothes while she looks at me, seated on the fitting room chair (not for so long as lately, she would just crawl and stand up haha). I would bring her with me while having dinner or coffee with friends.
So ME time’s really not applicable. Haha. And even though it’s tiring, I wouldn’t still trade it for anything. I gave up my career for now to take care of her, so bakit di ko pa sagarin diba? Haha.
One more thing – breastfeeding does not cost a thing! Well except if I request for a new dress or crave for so many food. Haha. In a way it helps my pride knowing that I cannot contribute financially – well at least I make my baby healthy with zero money involved. hahaha.
The only thing I don’t like is – it makes me so hungry all the time! I lost my pregnancy weight 2 months post partum but I gained 1-2kgs on the 5th month! So hard to lose weight! #mommyissues
But still…
I love breastfeeding. It gives me a sense of pride especially with the bond that Monica and I have. So thankful that things are looking good in our journey. <3

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Baby Blues: It's Real

Monica’s perfect in our eyes. As first time parents, we were really excited to show her to world. We had visitors, we were active in social media, and we talked about our baby non-stop. I was advised to have a complete rest. I did not listen.
On the 5th day, we went home. And that’s when it has sunk in. Our lives have changed for real. It was really hard for me to move, carry Monica, and find a position to nurse her. My mom stayed with us that night. She did our laundry, cooked for us, and cleaned our place.
The morning after, she had to go home and that’s when I started crying. I cried because of deeper respect and love for my own mother.
I cried every single day for one whole week. I cried because Monica refused to sleep at night, fussy and gassy. I cried because I cannot do the things I used to do. I cried because I felt I was so alone. I cried because I wanted to be with my mother – meaning, I want my old life. I cried because I wanted Monica inside my tummy again.  I cried because I was really tired and all I wanted was to sleep for 4 days straight. I cried because of a lot of things. And I was told it’s NORMAL.
BUT Beej, Monica, and I managed to get thru – with just the 3 of us physically and our parents/friends virtually. Haha. During Beej’s paternity leave, he would do all household chores while I recover and take care of Monica. It got better. We got used to it. Hoooray.
As they say, “the struggle is real”. It was so damn real. And worth it. <3

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Our Birthing Story: Hello there, Monica

Birthing Story: Part 1
Birthing Story: Part 2
At 7pm, I was brought to the operating room while Beej was signing documents (about change of package from Normal delivery to Emergency CS). I was feeling cold in the OR while they prepare for the operation. I think I fell asleep (probably because of the extra dosage of epidural) for a while because the next thing I remember was they called Beej already and my OB said, “Oh konting press lang to ha…”
Beej refused to look at my open tummy haha. He just took photos of what’s going on, took a video, and reassured me that it’s gonna be okay.
After a few minutes, we heard Monica cry.
Then they brought her to me for Unang Yakap and they had her latch on me. She’s beautiful. This little human being came out alive and healthy. Thank You Lord.
I cried of course and passed out.
I woke up after an hour and found myself in the recovery room. I was too excited to see and hold Monica. I was advised to move my legs while the effect of anesthesia is still there – it’s for me to cope better and to heal faster.
I can’t remember being tired. All I felt was happiness. Seeing Beej so smitten with our daughter was enough to forget what I went through.
Monica is love. Thank You God.
PS: And because of what I went through, NO, you cannot just tell me: “Ay CS ka pala?” TRY MO? Haha. #Galit 😛

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Our Birthing Story: Labor

Birthing Story: Part 1
So a little before 7am, I was already in the labor room, contractions here and there. Beej called my Mommy and informed about the situation.
Good thing was, Monica’s doing well inside, heart rate was good. Contractions were pretty regular and I would cry in between. MASAKIT. TALAGANG MASAKIT. My pain threshold was not that high, probably that’s why the early contractions were stressful already.
I called my mom because I know  she would panic knowing that her daughter is in pain. I cried and she told me she’ll be going to the hospital soon. I was advised to rest and sleep, but HOW? MASAKIT TALAGA.
Kudos to my husband for being so supportive and cheerful still, no signs of panic. Haha.
At 12 noon, I was checked again and to our surprise, it’s still at 4cm. Mind you, IE while contracting was really REALLY PAINFUL. Please lang.
Normally, dilation will progress at 1-1.5cm every hour. But in my case, the progress was very small. At that point also, I was crying of pain and I could not handle it anymore. I think the slow progress added to my frustration. I was so tired, hungry, and feeling so down and yet it seems there was no progress at all. The resident OB advised that I get an epidural already as it will make me rest because I won’t feel any pain at all. They decided to break my water and induce me to help with the dilation. We agreed.
Epidural was heaven for me. For a few hours, I got to rest but not sleep, at least I was inp peace even if contractions came every two minutes with high intensity.
And so we expected that at 4pm, I will be full dilated. I was checked  again and sadly, it only progressed to 5cm. Too bad. My OB said I should be 7-8cm dilated by 6om, if not we may have to talk about Emergency CS.
This stressed me out a little more. The cost, the pain, everything. The only consolation was, Monica’s still doing good inside.
6:30pm came. Sadly, it’s still at 5-6cm. Did not really progress that much. OB explained what happened and what will happen. We can opt to just wait till 8pm and see.
I was crying and feeling really tired already. I’m not sure if I can still do it. I prayed. Beej looked at me and decided we go emergency CS already. Awang awa na ang asawa ko. We hugged and prayed and got excited that finally, our baby will be with us soon.

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Our Birthing Story: Contractions

This story is about me, my husband, and our daughter.
I was told to just wait and let Monica come out when she’s ready. I did my share of walking, swimming, exercising – to get ready for her big day.
We went to the OB for our weekly check-up on Thursday, June 23. It was also the 39th week of Monica inside my tummy. I told Dra. Soci that I’ve been having contractions and had barely slept for a couple of days; I also told her I just had a pinkish discharge before meeting with her. She said it’s my body getting ready for labor. She did an internal exam and found out I was 2cm dilated already. Since it’s still early to tell, she sent us home and advised to just relax and wait.
Since Beej already took a leave, we went to the mall and walked (and walked and walked). From Greenbelt to SM, in between walks, I would have contractions and would stop for a few minutes.
On our way home, Beej was already monitoring my contractions. Around 6pm we reached home and my contractions were every 5-7 minutes already but pain was still manageable.I said I would still do some exercise but around 9pm, pain became intense and Beej decided we go to the hospital already.
Makati Medical Center, Delivery Room, June 23, 9:30PM. The resident OB checked and found out my dilation did not progress as it’s still 2cm. We were sent home because it’s still not progressing and the contractions were not regular.
We had light dinner at 11PM and went home. I was not able to sleep as contractions were becoming painful and regular again. I was crying and Beej was worried and decided we go back to the hospital. At 5Am we’re back at the hospital and at last my dilation progressed and it becamce 3cm. I was admitted and brought to the labor room.

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