“IT’S EMBARRASSING”

“Mommy, stop – it’s embarrasing” said my 6yo daughter.

Curious and shocked, I asked “huh? Why and how is it embarrassing?” I was genuinely in awe because all I remember saying was “see you can do it, I told you so!” Back story: She had a hard time getting her bike out because our car was parked in the garage and there was not much space to move around. Monica probably got so stressed in carefully moving the bike so as not to scratch the car.  

So going back; she then explained that it made her feel embarrassed and it did not feel good at all. “It’s embarrassing whenever you tell me “i told you so” because it’s like I am always wrong and you are right.”

Thoughts kept coming to my mind — those many, many times that I teased her whenever she disses food she has not tried yet only to love it after I insist for her to taste. And then I will remark “i told you!” 

All along I thought I was just teasing her. Little did I know, it created an emotion within her.

So I apologized in passing and just let her ride the bike. Business as usual, dinner, play, shower, read, lambing. 

We usually have sweet and deep convos while hugging before I put her to sleep. I saw the perfect opportunity to talk to her about the “embarrassment” incident.

I let her talk and share, explain and dig more. She doesnt feel comfortable whenever I make her try some food and then rub it to her face whenever she changes her mind and love the food instead. And I would keep saying “see haha i told you it’s yummy”. She felt like she was never right and I always make her feel that way.

While listening, all I could tell myself was “oh no, I was becoming a bully to my own daughter even though I never really meant it to be that way.” I was just being playful when I tease her.

Soon after, I hugged her tightly and I explained my side. “Mommy never intended for you to feel that way. I did not mean to hurt your feelings or embarrass you. It was not my intention. I was wrong for teasing you all the time. I am so sorry anak. I won’t do it again.”

“It’s okay mommy. You can still be playful, but only when I am in a super duper happy mood. Like we can play our game of you making me smile and I will try not to.” 

I kept apologizing as I felt really guilty. “When you are ready and okay, please accept my apology. But if not, it’s okay, I will wait. Thank you for telling me what’s on your mind and how you are really feeling.”

“I accept your apology mommy. I love you.” And the  we hugged and she fell asleep.

Oh wow what a conversation with a 6-yo. What a humbling experience for me as a parent. Sometimes, as an adult, we really think we are always right and that our ways should be followed most of the time. Sometimes we forget that children have feelings and minds of their own. 

And this incident put a stop to all those “i am the adult so…” moments. And just because it’s funny or light for me does not mean it is for others. Sounds like another golden rule in life in general, right?

Haaaay I learn so much from Monica.

Maybe tomorrow she can read this blog, so hello anak. I love you always. Thanks for our talk. Love, Mommy.

Picture taken in Bohol. An image that signifies how much weight I have in relation to the influence I can give my child.

Face to Face School After Two Years

After two long years, my school girl is now back on the school grounds! Today is her first day of face to face classes in the big school! She waited so long to be with classmates and teachers again. She has always loved learning; online or offline, she sure enjoys every second of it. It’s just extra special this time because she’s in the first grade in a new school!

We prepared for this — sleeping time, eating habits, etc. So last night, I made her (or should I say forced her haha) to sleep before 7pm and she did! Good job anak. Haha.

I woke her up at 5am; whew, 10 hours of sleep yey!!! I prepared one of her fave breakfasts, toasted bread with melted cheese plus sunny side up egg! She super loves the egg yolk so it was a delight for her! She had a glass of fresh milk then chomped her Scott’s vitamins after! 

Then I gave her a bath and prepper her school uniform. Off we traveled to Laguna — left Makati at 5:47 and arrived in school at 6:30! Took some photos then we kissed and hugged her goodbye. She didnt even look back and went straight to her classroom! 

And how am I now? I am okay but I really miss my baby. Beej and I are now having coffee here at Tim Hortons in Vista Mall Sta Rosa. It’s like our old days before we had Monica. It’s lovely but we miss our baby so much. Life is much more complete with our Monica.

I hope she is having a great time in school today. I can’t wait to hear her stories! We love you so much anak!!!

“YOU’RE SO PRETTY MOMMY”

I can’t count how many times Monica said “mommy you’re so pretty!” today. She literally tells me this even in my most unflattering moment: upon waking up; messy hair, messy clothes, sweaty, name it. I don’t know why she keeps doing it but it warms my heart. Well, at times I get really annoyed especially when I am busy and she just goes over me and kiss me nonstop. Haha.

And then I realized, maybe these are the tiny seeds I planted? I don’t know. I just remember telling her “aww my baby, why you so pretty?” Hahahaha. Baka naman sa akin pala nakuha. Ewan ko ba. Sobrang lambing na bata.

Haaaay. I love you Monica.

NEVER MISS MONDAY WORKOUT

But I’ve been missing Monday workouts for a few weeks now. Either I am not feeling well or I have errands to run. Haaay. Today, I chose to rest because my colds are at its worst I think. No sense of smell and taste but antigen test came our negative. Haaaay. Poor Monica because she kept complaining about her clogged nose the whole time she is in class.

hopefully we’ll get better soon!!!

SUNDAY AT HOME

Our colds are not getting any better so we decided to just stay home. Sad that we missed Sunday mass but I guess it’s for the better. Did saliva antigen testing again and still negative so yay.

Monica watched Darna today and it inspired her to be superhero, SuperSonica haha. Cute. She even said her name should be Darna Monica hahaha.

anyway, that’s it. Oh btw, I finally bought our living room ceiling light. Hirap pumili ha.

HOUSE VISIT

I have not blogged about this yet but here you go. We got a house and lot in Sta. Rosa last year and we are currently doing some renovations and extensions before we finally move in. Will share more about this next time. Hehe.


So today, Saturday, we visited #BautisTahanan and we’re pretty impressed with how the construction is going. It’s only our 6th week and they have already accomplished more than half of the deliverables. Super grateful to Mark and the kuya workers who are all mabait and masipag and magaling.

Our kitchen!

OH MASSAGE

Today felt like meh just like the past days, still has clogged nose. But the good thing is, I was able to do chores despite feeling unwell. I knew I needed a massage so I got one. I instantly felt relieved after an hour of stretch and pressure on the body. Ate Aubrey of Regent Spa is awesome! Ang galing!

My day went by without any grand happening so I guess that’s it for today. Oh, I am doing my best not to get mad at Monica as I put her to sleep. Haha. I really really try to be as gentle as possible because even though she loves me at my worst, I don’t want her to grow up needing to accept such behavior just because she loves someone.

ANOTHER DAY

Okay, so I almost forgot to write something for today! It’s 10:41pm, Monica is hugging me tightly while I watch ep7 of Extraordinary Atty Woo.

Another day of colds and cough and nowadays, it’s enough warrant to be worried. But we finally bought our own antigen kit and got ourselves tested — hooray for a very clear one line that says we are negative. And thankfully, none of the people I got close encounter with over the weekend has symptoms. So I guess this is just a regular cold.

Another day of being a mother. Monica wrote me a song today, a very sweet song at that. I always wonder why and how she’s always affectionate and loving to me when I don’t think I am worthy of the unlimited hugs and kisses. Maybe she’s just a naturally good and loving child. Or maybe, she really sees beyond my short temper. Oh I love my kid.

Another day of house construction, so far so good. I planned on blogging about the house journey but I just cant find the words hehe. Anyway, I am just happy that we’re more than half way and come October, we are moving in. Yay!

okay, bye. See ya tomorrow.

FORMING A HABIT

I read somewhere that building a habit makes one productive — and one of the things recommended, is to write at least a few sentences each day. So here I am making use of my paid website.

I really like to write my thoughts but somehow, I get clouded with the idea that words have to make sense and I have to transform everything into content. Well, that should not be the case right? Alright here we go, starting today, I will update my blog to remind me of what transpired during the day.

I’ve been coughing and sneezing since yesterday, gladly, no fever nor body pains. I also tested negative when I did the antigen test yesterday. It’s my 2nd year jump anniversary but I cant exercise because I need to rest. Booooo